The following is a list of each developmental stage. Each
level is defined in terms of its type of relatedness vs. separateness in
interpersonal development; and the interpersonal need which
motivates the individual at each stage.
The progressive sequence of transformations is affected by
the quality of relationships; the degree to which interpersonal needs are met;
and the balance between each new form of connectedness and its counterpoint of
separateness. Thus, this theory provides an integrated view of human
development in its balance between interpersonal and personal aspects of the
developmental process.
Infancy Bonding
vs. Withdrawal Need
for Responsiveness
Relationships
are essentially symbiotic with undifferentiated incorporative bonding, based on
survival needs involving interactive responding between infant and caretaker.
Bonding - When the need
for responsiveness is met this stage begins with close, fused relations with caretaker which later develop into an expressive playful
imitative connection.
Withdrawal
- Lack of responsiveness produces a sense of rejection and estrangement
associated with detachment, listlessness and failure to thrive.
Toddlerhood Attachment
vs. Detachment Need
for Acknowledgment
Relationships are more
differentiated in terms of interpersonal connectedness with a capacity for
balance between attachment to caretaker and exploration of the environment.
Attachment - When the
need for acknowledgment is met the dependable availability of the caretaker
enables secure interactions with people and safe exploration of the
environment.
Detachment
- Lack of acknowledgment and acceptance generates fear of abandonment,
detachment and rejection manifested in anxious clinging and/or avoidance of
interaction with people.
Early Childhood Interactiveness
vs. Disregard Need
for Attention
Relationships are more
assertive and others are perceived as psychologically separate persons. The
need for attention is indicative of interactive relating.
Interactiveness - When
the need for attention is met the capacity for associative interactive play is
enhanced and used as a means for meeting interpersonal and personal needs.
Disregard
- If the need for attention is not met, the child's egocentric tendencies
become dominant, evident in impulsive behavior and aggressive disregard for
others.
Middle Childhood Relatedness
vs. Self-Insistence Need
for Approval
Relationships are
essentially self-serving and concrete though involving awareness of others'
needs with a capacity for mutual consideration and cooperation.
Relatedness - When the
need for approval and liking is met, either by adults or peers, cooperation and
allegiance is promoted, generally for concrete goals or self
benefit.
Self-Insistence
- If the
need for approval is not met, the development of interpersonal skills and
positive self concept is impeded; often leading to manipulative, self-centered
exploitation of others.
Early Adolescence Affiliation
vs. Exclusion Need
for Affiliation
Relationships are
dominated by an anxious, conformity-oriented need for social acceptance and
liking by peers with a tendency to repress individual differences.
Affiliation
- When the need for affiliation is met there is an intense desire to conform,
and a focus on similarities of behavior and preferences of the desired clique
or person.
Exclusion
- If the need for affiliation is not met a devastating sense of personal and
social rejection leads to anxiety and low self-esteem.
Late Adolescence Belonging
vs. Alienation Need
for Belongingness
Relationships
are more differentiated and complex, reflecting a more clearly individuated
sense of the self in connection with others and increasing role orientation and
identity.
Belonging - When the need for belongingness is met active
interest and choice to belong to reference groups, institutions and roles is
promoted. This supports the sense of self in connection with others.
Alienation
- If the need for belongingness is not met a sense of bitter social
estrangement or a view of the self as unworthy and unacceptable may evolve with
interpersonal distancing.
Young Adulthood Intimacy
vs. Isolation Need
for Intimacy
Relationships reflect a
need for deeper personal sharing, intimate connection, and mutuality in
coordinating dependency and autonomy and a capacity for greater acceptance of
individual differences.
Intimacy - When the need
for intimacy is met there is an enhanced commitment and deeper involvement in
interpersonal communication, mutual responsibility, acceptance, respect, and
support.
Isolation
- If the need for intimacy is unfulfilled, a sense of desolation and emptiness
with a feeling of meaninglessness develops in relation to others with lack of
self-fulfillment.
Middle Adulthood Interdependence versus Interpersonal Constriction Need
for Reciprocity
Relationships reflect a
capacity for mature caring, need for reciprocal individuated connection, and
dynamic complex inter-relatedness with balanced multiplicity of goals and
relationships.
Interdependence - When
the need for reciprocity is met active interpersonal relatedness evolves with
appreciation of both distinct unique individuality and interdependent
connection.
Interpersonal Constriction
- If the need for reciprocity is unfulfilled a decline in connectedness occurs
with social estrangement, interpersonal impoverishment, and self-seeking
behavior.
Old Age Acceptance
vs. Loneliness Need
for Companionship
Relationships reflect the
challenge of facing loses and changes in social connections and continued
interpersonal closeness despite issues of the ultimate separation and dying.
Acceptance
- When the need for companionship is met active satisfying relationships with
optimistic attitudes are promoted and a tranquil acceptance of self and others.
Loneliness
- If the need for companionship is unfulfilled there develops social isolation,
resentment, bitterness, complaints, intrusive demands, or passive withdrawal.
