AUREET'S THEORY OF INTERPERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
Interpersonal Development across the Life Span: Communion and Its Interaction with Agency in Psychosocial Development
Aureet Bar-Yam (Boston University) and Miriam Bar-Yam (Northeastern University, Boston, MA)
In recent years feminist psychologists have raised important criticisms of traditional psychological theories, particularly those theories which propose to be comprehensive descriptions of human development. Gilligan [1982] argues that these theories have been dominated by a male-biased emphasis on separation and individuation, thereby failing to provide an understanding of development of relationships and connectedness. For example, Erikson's [1950, 1968] model of personality development begins with a stage of connectedness in infancy (trust vs. mistrust), but then fails to describe development in terms of relationships until the adult stage of intimacy versus isolation. One might wonder how the capacity for intimacy can suddenly emerge in later life, with almost no previous preparation, particularly when all prior development is focused on increasing separateness. Franz and White [1985] argue that Erikson's theory, in neglecting relationship issues, does not provide a framework for understanding how individuals move from the dependency of the trust versus mistrust stage to the mature interdependence of the intimacy stage. In light of these criticisms, there is a need for new theoretical understanding that accounts for the important function of interpersonal relations in the life cycle.
Many of the more recent conceptual efforts in this area (e.g., Kegan, 1982; Gilligan, 1982; Franz and White, 1985] have been influenced by Bakan's [1966] presentation of the duality of yearnings in human existence, namely the yearning for 'communion' and the yearning for 'agency', i.e., a yearning to be included and connected coexisting simultaneously with a yearning to be independent and autonomous. Both of these, the yearning for communion and interpersonal connectedness and the yearning for individuation and agency, must be accounted for in a comprehensive theory of development.
It is important to emphasize that these two needs are in constant tension throughout the life cycle and are manifested simultaneously at each stage of development. This simultaneity and its importance in development is aptly captured by Gilligan [1982, p. 66]: 'we know ourselves as separate only insofar as we live in connection with others, and ... we experience relationships only insofar as we differentiate other from self' .
Some theories have had difficulty with this concept. For example, Kegan [1982], while attempting to include both communion and agency in his portrayal of personality development, alternates the stages in his helix of evolutionary balances in favor of one theme or the other. However, in order for a theory to present a complete understanding of development, it must account for the continuous, simultaneous importance of both relationships and individuation at every point in the life cycle. Consequently, Franz and White's [1985] proposal of a two-strand, 'double-helix' model, 'in which two separate but interconnected strands of psychological individuation and attachment ascend in a spiral' [Franz and White, 1985, p. 247], appears to be more adequate for conceptualizing personality development. This double-helix model allows for the inclusion of transformations in both agency and communion themes, as well as their impact on each other throughout the life cycle.
